Back in the USA

"Isn't it so great to be back in the states? Doesn't it just make you thanks God for all of the things you have?" This is a question I was asked today by a lady at my church. I felt obliged to answer honestly, so I said, "No, not really." Am I thankful that God has blessed me so that I am able to live the life I do? Yes. However, I'm not relieved to be back to this insane culture and way of life. The level of comfort that we have here leads us into a lifstyle of self-sufficiency, which is absolutely no good for us. I don't depend on God for much here, at least I don't do so consciously. Those kids that I worked with in Costa Rica, and people who I have met in other countries realize their riches in Christ and depend on Him for their worldly survival. I am reminded of Matthew 6 when I think about this. Most people's primary concern is to provide for themselves and their family, but God says our primary concern should be His Kingdom, and that when we make this our primary concern, He will take care of the rest. He makes the lilies of the field beautiful and feeds birds, so what do we have to worry about. Truth be told, it's hard for me to be back here and to be forced to take a look at myself and my lifestyle. I want to depend on God. I want to learn what it means to hunger and thirst for God and His presence, to be aware of my utter dependence on him, and I want to learn what it is like to wrestle with God in prayer! Keep me in your own prayers.